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	<title>The Life Optimist &#187; double-bowling-date</title>
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	<link>http://thelifeoptimist.com</link>
	<description>a little bit of life and love positivity</description>
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		<title>The Freakin&#8217; Fun Dating List</title>
		<link>http://thelifeoptimist.com/theblog/the-freakin-fun-dating-list/</link>
		<comments>http://thelifeoptimist.com/theblog/the-freakin-fun-dating-list/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 28 Sep 2009 16:07:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Optimisms]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[double-bowling-date]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[motivation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ring & run]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://thedatingoptimist.com/?p=796</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Last month, my friends and I got together on a Friday night. We were about to fall asleep on the couches in front of the TV when we decided to give ourselves some get-up-and-go: We made a list of all the fun things we could potentially do, cut the ideas into separate pieces and put [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Last month, my friends and I got together on a Friday night. We were about to fall asleep on the couches in front of the TV when we decided to give ourselves some get-up-and-go: We made a list of all the fun things we <em>could</em> potentially do, cut the ideas into separate pieces and put them all in a hat. (Yes, we&#8217;re grown-ups.)</p>
<div id="attachment_954" class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 219px"><img class="size-medium wp-image-954" title="photo_4066_20090126" src="http://thedatingoptimist.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/photo_4066_20090126-209x300.jpg" alt="photo_4066_20090126" width="209" height="300" /><p class="wp-caption-text">What&#39;s on your list? (Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net)</p></div>
<p>We decided we&#8217;d do the first three items we picked from the hat. Suddenly, the adrenaline was running high: <em>&#8220;Oh no,&#8221;</em> I thought,<em> &#8220;Someone suggested &#8220;Ring &amp; Run&#8221;&#8230;what if we picked <span style="font-style: normal;">that</span> one?</em> (Wait, <em>are</em> we grown-ups?)</p>
<p>In the end, we picked &#8220;Get a cocktail,&#8221; &#8220;Go swimming in the bay&#8221; and &#8220;Dance to a song of Todd&#8217;s choice.&#8221; It turned out to be an epic evening of night swimming, dancing and dares as we tackled the items on the list. And it makes me wonder: <span style="color: #a00d5c;"><strong>If we can find the fun in living life like that sometimes, shouldn&#8217;t we be able to muster that same joy about love and dating?</strong></span> <strong><span style="color: #a00d5c;">And the magic may be in the </span></strong><em><strong><span style="color: #a00d5c;">list</span></strong></em><strong><span style="color: #a00d5c;">.</span></strong></p>
<p><strong><span style="color: #a00d5c;"><span style="color: #000000; font-weight: normal;">An article in the <em>Journal of Applied Biobehavioral Research</em> reported a few moons ago that exercisers who wrote down ideas about how to make their effort more enjoyable ended up <em>doing</em> those things, which did, in fact, make their exercise more enjoyable. Ta-daaa!</span></span></strong></p>
<p>Sounds like a great idea to apply to your love life, doesn’t it? Now, I&#8217;m a big believer that if you&#8217;re not enjoying dating, <em>don&#8217;t do it.</em> But if you want to meet new people and see what potential mates might be out there, then maybe it&#8217;s worth making dating more fun so you&#8217;ll want to do it. Your Freakin&#8217; Fun Dating List could help! The lead author of the exercise study said that <span style="color: #a00d5c;"><strong>drawing on positive past experiences is more motivating than abstract ideas</strong></span>. So use that to your advantage when you make your dating list: When have you had the most fun dating in the past? When you sampled a strange-sounding single’s event with a friend? When you signed up for a sailing trip? When you made a singles trip to scout the guys carrying lumber at Home Depot? When you played “Truth or Dare” at a friend’s party full of cute guys?</p>
<p>No, you don&#8217;t have to do all the things on the list—the way we actually didn&#8217;t do the &#8220;Ring &amp; Run&#8221; on ours. I think it&#8217;s healthy just to remind yourself how much fun dating <em>can </em>be. So think about making the list—either on paper or in your mind—whether you do any of the items or not. I think you&#8217;ll be more positive for the process. And if you <em>do</em> end up on a double-bowling-date laughing your gutter balls off? More power and funny shoes to ya.</p>
<p><em>You might also like:</em><br />
<a href="http://thedatingoptimist.com/theblog/walk-a-mile-in-your-true-shoes/"><strong><span style="color: #ff6600;">Walk a Mile in Your True Shoes</span></strong></a><br />
<a style="text-decoration: none;" href="http://thedatingoptimist.com/with-a-little-help-from-your-friends/thecoffeetest/"><span style="color: #ff6600;"><strong>The Coffee Test</strong><strong> </strong></span></a></p>
<p>Big love,</p>
<p><img class="alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-952" title="Amy Signature 4" src="http://thedatingoptimist.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/Amy-Signature-416-150x80.jpg" alt="Amy Signature 4" width="150" height="80" /></p>
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