Can you find the upside to this?

Not that Brandon expected the attention, mind you. The first morning he went outside in public, he pulled on a pair of shorts and said, “Oh man, I’m so pale, do you think I’m going to look stupid?” We had to remind him, “Um, Brandon? They’re not gonna be looking at your legs….”

For many people, getting screwed into a halo would keep them home. Did it stop Brandon? Hells no! The first time I saw him, he was wobbling into a Hooters of all places, for wings and beer. He went on hikes, hit the beach, rode the ferris wheel and drank  champagne cocktails at my husband’s art party at a loft downtown all while wrapped up in goofy sweatshirts cut open to fit over his contraption. And you know what I saw? Girls flocking to him like moths to flame, mice to cheese, Mad Men characters to cigarettes.

Brandon didn’t feel a bit sorry for himself, and it made the people around him feel the same way. What women saw when they spoke to him was a guy with a zest for life, a great sense of humor, and a spirit that would not be squashed, not even under the weight of a 20-pound chunk of metal. Instead of groaning about his halo, he had girls put flowers in it! Instead of focusing on the outside, he looked at the upside.

Making the most of a bad situation (Image: AS)

Brandon’s healed and free of his halo now, but his story sticks with me. I know, for instance, I used to pity myself at times when I was single—over my dried up dating life or the crappy day I had or the people who didn’t call me back. (Clearly, I should have read 11 Ways Being Single Beats Being in a Relationship!) But then I’d look at people who keep a positive attitude through far worse experiences, and I was reminded that no matter what life doles out, it’s our job to find the upside within us. Our life is what we make of it from the inside. Your wonderful attitude is what’s going to bring you the happiness you seek and the love you’re looking for. So find the upside. There’s nothing more attractive than an unstoppable optimist!

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WWJS: What Would Joan Say?

Big love,

Peggy needed a branding lesson (Image: Carin Baer, AMC.com)

Peggy, a mostly straight-laced, hardworking advertising copywriter was trying to paint a plainly honest portrait of herself in an ad requesting a roommate in Manhattan. But it took Joan Holloway, the smartest secretary in the office, to point out, really, who gets excited about a plainly honest anything? Joan plucked the typed ad from Peggy’s hands and read it aloud. 

“Clean, responsible, considerate…I have some nice furniture and a small television?” Joan felt Peggy needed to put a more self-confidant spin on her qualities, to sell herself more in her ad:

“This is about two young girls in Manhattan. This is about an adventure. Am I wrong? If this were me, I would say something like, ‘Fun loving girl. Responsible, sometimes. Likes to laugh, lives to love, seeks size six for city living and general galavanting. No dull moments or dull men tolerated.’ Or something like that. And don’t put it up there. Everyone here knows you. Branch out.”

Same Peggy, same request, entirely different sell.

WWJS: What would Joan say? (Image: Carin Baer, AMC.com)

Joan’s right. We’re not doing ourselves any favors by painting the blandest portrait of ourselves we can, as honest as we may think we are. Sure, “smart, nice, successful and kind” may be good qualities, but you’re more than that! Re-brand yourself the way Joan Holloway might. Ask yourself this one question: WWJS? What would Joan say?

She might remind you that you’ve got a killer bod, a stellar wit, or a warmth worth traveling a thousand miles to be near. If so, start feeling it! How else are people going to see the fabulous person you are if you don’t sell yourself that way?

Re-brand yourself in the best light, the one you deserve to be in. No dull descriptions tolerated.

Big love,

The Drapers tackle tough conversations (Photo by Frank Ockenfels from AMC.com)

Never mind that I could watch a full hour of Mad Men on AMC just to see Betty Draper in as many clothes as they can pull from her closet. (And, yes guys, I know you prefer Joan, the busty red-headed secretary.)

This week, Don said something that went much deeper than the sets and scenes (and historic smoking) we love so much. He said something that can actually change our lives.

In context, Don Draper was trying to land the Madison Square Garden account by helping the company defend their plans in the early 60s to demolish the current Penn Station (and by the way, can you believe they did it?!). The MSG client was tired of the public outcry and wanted to quiet it down. Don, taking a page from the publicist handbook, told his client this:

“If you don’t like what’s being said, change the conversation.”

Yes, sometimes we have to face tough conversations head on. But you know when this can really work? In the conversations we have with ourselves. If you don’t like what you’re telling yourself, change it. You are responsible for the words spinning around in your brain, so if you catch yourself being too negative (“It’ll never happen”) or beating yourself up (“It’s your fault this is happening”) or spiraling into frustration (“I’m so tired of all this”) then put some spin on your own story and change what’s being said.

It’s like another quote I read about the news: If you don’t like the news, go out and make some of your own. Change the conversation and make your own news. You’re bound to go up from there.

Big love,